i remember what he said
(just the other day)
when i asked what he felt
as he hung on display
for all to see
with so many waiting
for some sign or proof
of his divinity (or maybe
just filled with idle
curiosity?) —
in one swift motion
he lifted me up
to a towering precipice
and held my bony shoulders
and asked me to lean over
and gaze down
into an endless abyss
which yawned deeper and darker
than any my mind
could possibly glimpse.
“this,” he whispered
in my ear. and drunk
from that dizzying height
i nearly fell forward
but his strong hands held
me fast and reassured me
that all would be fine
one day, that all could
be won and lost
and ultimately
forgiven.
i remember the pale blue
clearness of her eyes
(so long ago)
as they gazed right through
to the very heart of me,
reading my soul in ways
no one else ever could.
without a word between
us i knew exactly
what she asked, and held
by the gravity
of that singular moment
i steadied my nerves,
readied my pilum
and in one swift motion
of will and iron
pierced his side to end
their private pain
while the world
looked on as
he died.
and now i’m left behind —
remembering (to remember).
